There’s probably not a single person in the world that could safely sit through the full length of our list of 10 most annoying YouTube videos ever and live to –sanely- tell the tale. I sure as hell couldn’t do it; I’d rather get fired than play a 10 hour Nyan Cat video, so come on, I dare you.
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I’m not certain what it is that draws us humans to consume needless visuals that will utterly irritate us, but it seems to be something of a masochist addiction. Probably every YouTube user has at one time or another willfully subjected him or herself to one of these abominations; it must have something to do with death drive, or better said: brain death drive.
If you are someone who works on their computer, then you probably already are a slave of the visual kingdom of the moving image, so if what you’re looking for is fun, then I’d refer you to our Top 10 Funniest YouTube Channels in 2015. However, if for some reason what you wish is to grind your teeth uncontrollably until there’s nothing but gums left, then check out this list of maddening videos I’ve compiled for you!
10. Most Annoying Song in the World
Although calling it “The most annoying song in the world” is overselling it, it definitely deserves its place in the 10 most annoying YouTube videos ever list.
It consists of an irritating remix of already aggravating song “You’re Beautiful”, by James Blunt, and although the video consists of just a smiley face turning sad, it perfectly depicts the feeling. The whole thing was uploaded in September 2007, so in less than a year it’ll be turning 10, but here’s the funny thing: this bag of shenanigans actually predicted what music would sound like today!
I am not kidding; this wavy, loopy, glitchy, sampled sound would be later on be recognized as its own musical gender: Vaporwave. Have you ever heard of Macintosh Plus? If you have, you know what I’m talking about. It just seems so funny to me how what was considered unbearable to listen to ten years ago, people will voluntarily play in their homes nowadays. Humans are hilarious.
9. My Name Is Boxxy
I don’t care what her name is; all I know is I have never seen someone use so many filler sounds and unnecessary words in the same speech, like, umm, I don’t even ehrm get, like, idk, what is she saying? Not only does Boxxy seem incapable of blurting out a sentence without interrupting it with a million “uhm”s, but also her exceedingly excited attitude makes her speech absolutely incomprehensible. For a little while there I even wondered if the video was fast-forwarded, for real.
I know she’s trying to play it nice, and fun, and cute, but it definitely doesn’t work for me, I just want to kill her. Also, I’m pretty sure if she read this, she’d be all “Yeah, uhm, that’s okay! I don’t mind! I, like, love you anyway!” which would make me hate her even more. She kind of reminds me of Alec Baldwin’s guest appearance on Friends, where he plays Phoebe’s over enthusiastic boyfriend, because she’d be perfectly described as “Santa Claus on Prozac, at Disneyland, getting laid!”. God, how I hate those kinds of people.
8. Head on! Apply directly to the forehead!
At first glance, this short piece of film is as unnerving as it is perplexing, because one is confused and astounded by how insulting to the viewer’s intelligence the marketing strategy is. This is a recording of a woman with a phony over-optimistic voice (like a kindergarten teacher) repeating the same instructional phrase over and over. “Head on! Apply directly to the forehead!” will stick with you for days. Definitely deserves to be on the list of most annoying YouTube videos ever, right?
At the same, you’ll be equally shocked by the product itself, which looks like a UHU bar, so the video just appears to be a woman applying glue to her forehead over and over. Also, notice the fact that nowhere in the tagline or the picture does it specify what the product is supposed to do, so it’s not a commercial as much as it is an order.
All in all: you’d have to be a complete idiot to buy this product.
7. Rebecca Black – Friday
You knew this would be here. It is astounding how much popular hatred this video achieved ever since it came out, but as to the “why”, there’s no mystery. Awesome website Urban Dictionary accurately defines Rebecca as: “Annoying teenage singer who sings the song “Friday”. Autotune can’t save her nasally monotone voice, her facial expressions are annoying, and her lyrics were written by 5-year-olds that are learning their days of the week.” Furthermore, even though I’m not one to advocate in favor of violence, the previous combination makes me want to punch her so bad it hurts. Of course, I wouldn’t do that; making her cry, however, would be totally valid and quite pleasurable, I reckon.
Face it, Rebecca, no one wants to “get down” with annoying little you, especially on a Friday, we’ve got better things to do. It doesn’t even look like the people in the video can stand her, they all just seem super uncomfortable with forced extra-large smiles on their faces.
6. Donald Trump Says “China”
Wait, so, China, right? This video ended up on this list of most annoying YouTube videos ever because it is really annoying to listen Trump repeating it so much that the word completely loses all of its significance. In any case, what does “I have to have my China” even mean?
It makes sense that he admires the country so much, after all, they’re famous for building the largest wall in the world, so it must be a great source of inspiration for USA’s president-elect. I think if he ever gets to build his unrealistic barrier, he should either name it “The Great Wall of Mexico”, “The Great Wall of Xenophobia”, or, in an even more redneck-ish note, “The Great Wall of Get-Outta-ma-Propertey”.
Back to China, China, China; I agree that China will play a great role in the decade to come, but that’s no news, so could we please talk about something else? Let’s talk gay rights, or racism, or sexual harassment, because all I know is that when this guy is finally president, all us girls will have to build a wall around our va-Chinas, since it seems groping will okeydokey.
5. Annoying Orange
Is it just me, or does the orange kind of sound like Steve Buscemi?
We all know and hate this video. We hate it so much it actually makes us love it a little, therefore it’s indispensable on our list of 10 most annoying videos on YouTube ever. I guess we all feel such deep annoyance because at one time or another we have met people who actually behave like this, I know I have, but since I don’t really give a crap what people think, whenever I encounter such an irritating specimen I just turn around and walk away. I think it’s the healthiest thing to do.
Still, I do believe this video deserves the credit for all the no-nose Trump GIFs that have been spawned in the last year. Now that I think about it, I’m not sure who annoys me more! If we combine Trump’s China, China, China video posted earlier, with Annoying Orange, we’d probably have a weapon of mass distraction in our hands. Just imagine broadcasting this engender on broadcast TV, it’d be a recipe for mass suicide.
4. I Will Always Love You NOT
I don’t know about you, but I just can’t stand this video!I hate it with passion. Her voice is annoying, her pitch is annoying, her way of flipping out is annoying, and her complete unawareness of how annoying she is annoying. It just makes me want to put my hand down her throat and rip out her vocal chords, it would be an act of heroism.
Listening to someone sing out of key is always irritating, so why is this video even on YouTube for everyone to see? Or an even better question, why have I seen it so many times? I don’t find it even remotely funny, it just makes me cringe every damn time, but I just keep doing it. Masochism at its finest.
3. Jelly Rat Fiend
The third place on our list of the most annoying YouTube videos ever we goes to Jelly Rat Fiend. Ok, first of all: what is up with that voice? It sounds like a balloon being slowly and noisily deflated by an elementary schooler with ADHD. Even though I try, I can’t imagine what this person looks like, my mind just can’t identify what kind of human being could possess such irritating pitch and accent.
Secondly, whoever this person is, they should not be allowed to own or use surgical instruments, since I suspect the “surgery” he/she’s performing on the poor jelly rat is just serving as practice, so as to later apply the knowledge on real breathing animals. It just makes me uneasy that this human being exists.
Still, what bothers me the most is their disrespect for candy -I am a big supporter of candy rights. It’s for eating, not beating!- I’d get it from a child, but this actually seems to be a grown person, so I hope that the poor thing could at least fulfill its destiny of being devoured, after enduring this endless torture.
2. Whisper Eating sounds
No, NO, NOOOOO!!!! After she started eating, I couldn’t make it past 30 seconds. Also, why is she whispering? Why would anyone make an effort to eat louder than they talk? I know not everyone is as squeamish as I am about eating noises, but this is just absolutely unbearable, you’d have to be deaf not to loathe this.
This video will prove particularly annoying for those who, like me, suffer from Misophonia, a condition that has not been officially accepted by science, so there’s not a lot of research on it, but it does affect a lot of people, and it generates very violent impulses. I’d advise this girl to erase her many horrid loud eating videos if she wants to avoid a smacking, or at least to avoid her videos end up on the lists of most annoying YouTube videos ever.
1. Nyan Cat 10 Hour Video
This video unavoidably deserves the n°1 place in our list of the 10 most annoying YouTube videos ever. Just imagine all the information you could get out of a prisoner just by leaving him in a room with this diabolic video playing for 10 hours straight; forget death metal, anyone will crack under this crap, and I’m pretty sure it’d leave serious consequences.
Bearing this in mind, it is also crucial to acknowledge that Nyan Cat has its own website, which is exactly the same as the video, except it’s endless, and there is no stop button and no volume control. It actually tells you how many seconds you’ve “Nyaned”, therefore I can only assume the creator is an evil genius who became filthy rich by performing the most annoying experiment on the internet community ever. Kudos, your Satanic Majesty.
